Psalms 73:25 is the first verse that impressed me most, although it is not a reality yet. Whenever I look at myself, I just feel so disappointed, so disillusioned. I am not able. Praise the Lord I have Him as my Overcomer who fills all and in all. I have the Church as my living. I was bought with a price, not with any precious gold and stones, but with His own precious blood.

The Lord has been so faithful ever since. Throughout my whole Christian walk, it was last year that I experienced all the peeling, breaking and terminating of myself and my natural man. He exposed me quite a few times, and revealed to me that everything of the self belongs to the cross. Through experiences and situations caused by His sovereignty, I experienced Him more and more. With the Lord's sovereignty, I'm finishing my course next year - in preparation for my Full-Time Training. I'm counting the months now, won't be too long till the fulfilment of my consecration, if the Lord so desires. Can't wait to be perfected and trained to be a fit vessel for Him. I thought mom would not understand; they might regard it as a waste as many thought of. but praise the Lord I can stand behind Him and be headed up in all things. I've planned further after my FTT, yet not my will. The Lord's vineyard is so big. I'll keep praying for London, it is where my heart is for some time now. Or go back here in Sydney... Or study again... Or serve locally... Or work... Or marry my helpmeet and start a house serving the Lord.  The key is to be fully open to Him, to His will and His dispensing. In the Church, there in no place for the so-called "I" and the "self". It's all a matter of living by faith. I'm a slave with a Master, and there's nothing I can do but to say "amen" to His will.